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Saturday, September 6th, 2003
1:42p - fucking vivid
i must be getting my period soon because i had THE MOST vivid dream last night. i always get crazy mad vivid dreams before that time o the month. hrm.

anyway, the whole thing was like a movie. in fact, it kept switching off between being a movie i was watching/had watched and something that was actually happening to me.

the dream starts off very hazy, at least, the details are hazy. i believe i was in michigan, driving around. it was somewhere out in the countryside -- there were silos, as i recall.

the details start to come into focus inside an older-looking victorian house. the events were as follows -- i was married to steve (reduxde), except it wasn't really him. in fact, it kept switching off between him and marcelo (loplop). (this was one of those really complicated, uberly weird dreams.) anyway, he went crazy and tried to kill me and a bunch of other people. this happened twice -- once in the movie, and once in real life.

in the movie version, which i was just watching and not participating in, the killer actually succeeded in killing all the people. it was incredibly bloody and violent. this may just be the most violent dream i've ever had.

in the real version, i was scared out of my wits because i had seen the movie and knew my hubby was going to go insane and try to kill me, in a very painful and bloody way. there were cops everywhere, but they seemed to think they couldn't do anything. finally, he started to try to attack me with a knife. he stabbed my side and my hand as i attempted to wrestle the knife out of his hands. i succeeded and he was taken away by the police. however, only his weapon was taken away and he was allowed to still wander freely. he kept coming up to me and talking to me and it was so difficult because i knew he was a homicidal maniac but i still loved him deeply. i wondered why he had cracked, and there were even moments when time went backward and i attempted to dissuade him from his future attempt at murder, or to figure out the root of his insanity.

*********

i think dreams just don't work the way waking life does. time is different, space is different. time is not linear, nor does it move as we expect it. thus, when we try to explain dreams later (like my above attempt), it just doesn't sound right. no words can explain the events that occured in my mind last night, because no words have been created in our language to express or process the strangeness that is dreaming life.


current mood: geeky

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